


Chasing you into the dark

by EarthsickWithoutYou



Series: With all my heart [2]
Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Romance, Secret Relationship, Shameless Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-29
Updated: 2018-01-29
Packaged: 2019-03-11 03:37:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,564
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13515789
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EarthsickWithoutYou/pseuds/EarthsickWithoutYou
Summary: After Harry's flirtatious and quite public comment about how Caitlin's "got it" during 4x11, she worries that their friends will catch onto their secret relationship.  But confronting Harry about it reveals his hurt feelings and forces Caitlin to confront the love she's afraid to give into.





	Chasing you into the dark

“Harry, wait up!” Caitlin called, hurtling down the hallway to catch up.

Despite her speedy approach, heavy breathing and anxious expression, Harry looked at her nonchalantly, replying simply, “Snow.” He kept walking towards his room.

“You can’t say stuff like that, not in front of the team,” she urged, prompting him to pause for a moment, eyebrows raised.

“Say stuff like what?” He folded his arms across his chest.

“You know, that whole…’you got it’…thing,” Caitlin babbled nervously, his cool demeanor making her increasingly frazzled. “We agreed to keep the newer…dimension of our relationship a secret for now.”

Harry chortled in a way she found very condescending. He strode into his room, flicking a couple of lamps on and pouring himself a drink. Although his manner was calm and almost dismissive, she saw from his body language and the haunted look in his eyes that something was really bothering him.

“What?” Caitlin asked, following him automatically and shutting the door. 

“ _You_ decided to keep it a secret. I believe I had my head between your thighs at the time. I was a little busy.” He took a sip of his drink and sat down on the couch he’d somehow managed to cram into his almost punishingly tiny quarters.

Caitlin’s face turned bright red. “Harry!” She immediately experienced flashbacks to their several intense lovemaking sessions, making it hard to think of anything else, much less that she was supposed to be frustrated with him at the moment.

“Is there something I can do for you, Caitlin?” Harry asked in a low, cold tone which was as offensive as it was arousing. What was he doing to her, Caitlin wondered for the thousandth time.

“Why are you being like this?” Caitlin demanded, flustered. She walked over to him, plucking the glass from his hand and finishing his drink. She handed him the glass theatrically, because he wasn’t the only one who could be extra.

He gave that short, unamused laugh again, darkness lurking in his expression. “Maybe I’m just sick of being your dirty little secret, Cait.” Still, he put his knee between her legs, easing them open, making her suck in a breath. _Yes!_ Her heart and body screamed, _Yes! Please, please!_ There were plenty of ways to describe his effect on her, but “low-key” was certainly not one of them.

“You know why I felt we should keep our relationship under wraps, Harry,” she objected, laying her hand over his as he began to stroke her legs, his touch drifting upward. Caitlin licked the spicy liquor from her lips and looked down at him. He shot her an intent, worshipful look, placing her in his power again, right where she longed to be.

“With everything we’re going through right now, the team is in crisis mode,” Caitlin continued, her voice catching as their joined hands reached her upper thigh, then her underwear. Harry began stroking her there as she shadowed him with her touch, not because he needed instruction, but because following his movements so closely turned her on. “Mmm,” she sighed deeply, bucking forward slightly, her hands falling onto his shoulders.

Harry took her by the waist and pulled her into his lap. Caitlin lifted and spread her legs widely, forcing her skirt upwards. “It would be…a little weird to interrupt all of the stress and important work we’re doing to help Barry and defeat DeVoe if we…just…” Caitlin lost the rest of the sentence, feeling her panties dampen and a hot pulse begin at her core as Harry swept her shirt over her head with one fluid motion. He ran a long, skillful finger from her chin down to the waistband of her skirt, and Caitlin’s head tilted upward, eyes closing. 

“If we just what?” Harry inquired, unclasping her bra and tossing it over the top of the couch, his hands encompassing her breasts as Caitlin rubbed against him, causing a sharp sigh of his own.

“If we just waltz into the lab and announce, ‘hey, guys, we’re sleeping together! Carry on with your day!’” Caitlin put two hands into his hair, playing with it, smoothing then ruffling the tousled raven mop to her heart’s content. She followed his cheekbones, then his jawline with her fingers, grazing his lips as they opened to reply.

“‘Sleeping together,’” He repeated, “Because that’s all this is, right?” He took firm hold of her ass, his hands slipping beneath her panties. “That’s the real reason you’re so determined to hide what’s happening. You don’t think this is going anywhere…except the bedroom…up until you decide that your little ill-advised fling with an older co-worker who has too much emotional baggage is over. And then you won’t have to talk about it ever again, because no one else will have even known about it.” His touch receded, landing lightly on her thighs as the true reasons why he was upset were finally revealed. He pulled his steely blue gaze from her surprised look and Caitlin put a finger under his chin, tipping his focus back to her.

“Why would you ever think that?” She asked, her lips shaking as tears sprang into her eyes. The worst part was, she already knew the answer. She was accusing the wrong person of creating the problems and confusion between them. What else had she led Harry to believe, with the shady way she’d been behaving, sneaking into his room at night and out again in the morning? Caitlin hadn’t been honest with Harry or herself, and to continue postponing that dangerous truth, she’d never spoken with him about their encounters unless they were in the midst of one.

“That is _not_ what this is,” Caitlin insisted, leaning in to kiss his mouth tenderly. He looked at her in hurt bewilderment. “I just needed time to get used to this, to us. Every time I’ve gotten involved with someone in the past, it’s ended disastrously. By keeping this casual and secretive, I think I was kind of…procrastinating on that painful, inevitable ending part.”

“How involved are we?” Harry inquired huskily, rubbing her back comfortingly. Even though she’d hurt him, he could see how hard of a time she’d been having, trying to process her emotions. His immediate response was to offer Caitlin solace, putting his own angst aside. It killed her to see Harry so instantly compelled to soothe her for being too afraid of dealing with this to treat him right. 

“Oh, Harry,” Caitlin said haltingly, laying her hand over his heart. “I thought you knew. I thought you could feel it when we…”

“I’m not a mind-reader, Caitlin, and I come fully equipped with my own very potent set of insecurities.” He held her half-naked body close, her breasts pressing against his shirt, his hands still roving generously over her back. “I thought you liked me fucking you anyway, and I decided that for me, that ought to be enough. That I was lucky to get that much and shouldn’t expect more. I cut myself off from _hoping_ for more, but then…it didn’t work, and I’ve been torn up inside ever since. I’m crazy about you, you know that? I’d wait for you forever. I would,” he repeated firmly.

“Yeah,” Caitlin admitted, because she did know. From the first scorching kiss he’d laid on her unprepared lips, she’d known. The soulful, earnest way he looked at her was undeniable proof. She wasn’t about to confront what it did to her emotions, but she’d wanted it, taken advantage of it to get the closeness she craved from him. She’d gone on lying to herself that it was just a friends with benefits thing, even though _that_ was so unlike her that it brought up natural suspicions about deeper feelings she was repressing. 

“Do you really know?” Harry asked, raking his fingers through her hair until the brunette curls fanned out around her shoulders, bouncing lightly against her bare skin. He put his lips to her ear and whispered, “I love you, Cait.”

“I love you too,” she confessed heatedly. She pressed kisses all over his face in a desperate haze, needing so much for him to know it was true. “I want to be with you for real. I don’t want to hide anymore. If that means opening myself up to heartbreak again, then—”

“I’ll never, _ever_ break your heart,” Harry vowed. 

“Maybe not on purpose. But with the life we lead…we can never be sure of what might happen someday. That’s something I’ve struggled with so hard, but if I don’t accept that risk, there’s no way forward for us. And I need there to be a way for you and me.” Her voice was thick with feeling, the look of empathetic pain he shot her taking her breath away. 

“I wish I could promise you those risks don’t exist, but I can’t,” Harry admitted, looking bereft. “What I _can_ do is love you, as long as you’ll let me, as much as I can, which I can assure you is a lot.”

“Show me?” Caitlin asked tremulously. Harry nodded and scooped her up in his arms, their lips meeting over and over until he rested her body on his bed.

“Wait,” she said, knowing that if she let him, he would fully dedicate himself to her pleasure before seeking any for himself. “I want to show you, too.”

“Alright,” Harry agreed as she removed his shirt, then unbuttoned his pants and pushed them down. “Show me you love me,” he said, his mouth so near her own that the words vibrated sexily against her. Caitlin pressed him gently down on his back and kissed his slender, yet muscular torso, her hair trailing over his chest, then his stomach as she made her way down further and further, gradual and deliberate. Licking his erection slowly, lingeringly, she let her eyes meet his. He was barely breathing, his fingers tangled in her hair, following the bobbing motion of her head as she engulfed him in her mouth. By the time he surrendered, his hips spasming up and his deep moan making Caitlin’s head spin, she knew she needed much more of him, and right away.

“Could you feel that?” She asked, loving his tight grip on her arms, letting her know that he needed her support as he recovered the ability to speak. 

“Yes,” Harry finally said, his voice tight with yearning, wanting to take this further as much as she did. He licked her stomach, feeling her sudden intake of breath and smiling at the sight of her skirt still hitched up around her waist. “I like these,” he said in reference to her grey cotton bikini panties, which were plain except for the small pink bow at the top. They weren’t the sort of undergarments generally assumed to drive men wild, but Harry’s reaction proved otherwise. He wasted no time in lavishing his oral attentions on Caitlin as she rested a foot on his back, rubbing up and down as he continued to draw out her ecstasy. When she came, she began to tremble hard, like she always did with him, and Harry caressed her legs attentively, listening to her soft, sweet whimpering and resting his head against her breasts. His fingers wandered there, playing with her nipples tentatively, patient. 

“Show me more,” she asked sooner than he had expected. Harry laced his fingers through Caitlin’s, holding her down on the bed as he thrust into her. The way she was moaning had him longing to taste the ragged sounds, so they made out wantonly as he continued. “More, don’t stop,” she urged, and he followed her commands to the letter, thrusting in and out, grabbing her waist to get deeper still. “More…” she gasped because it was too much and never enough. Caitlin sighed loudly, repeatedly as her orgasm blossomed, powerful and sharp, followed by Harry’s helpless groan as he fell into her waiting embrace.

“I’m so sorry,” Caitlin told him softly later on, as they sat curled up on his couch, wrapped in a blanket. She had thrown one of his sweaters on, the hem skimming her thighs, and she loved the way the buttery, well-worn fabric felt against her skin, how it smelled like Harry, warm, spicy, irresistible. Perhaps when they’d wandered out and flopped down here, they’d meant to watch t.v. or check their phones, but it hadn’t happened. They were completely wrapped up in each other, lost in thought. “I took your heart for granted when it’s the most important, precious thing in the world to me,” she added.

“Don’t worry about it, Cait. If _I’d_ said something out loud a lot sooner, we could’ve skipped over plenty of confusion,” Harry clarified. “It’s more my fault…probably.”

“Cut it out,” Caitlin laughed, “Before O. Henry shows up to write our story.”

Harry pretended to look around in alarm. “I hope not. I don’t need him seeing me almost naked.” She had to admit, she hadn’t been planning to complain about the snug-fitting, black boxer briefs he’d slipped on.

“Maybe not,” she grinned, “But what about me?”

He kissed her and said with with a devilish smile, “That’s a different story altogether, Dr. Snow. That’s more a case of…take me, I’m yours.”

“A tempting proposition,” Caitlin smirked, but his fingers grazed her stomach and he gave her a pointed look.

“Your tummy is rumbling. You’re starving. I think we’d better hit the brakes on the sex for now.”

Caitlin scoffed. “He said never!”

“There’s more than one way to take care of the woman I love, and I plan to be there for every one of them,” he pointed out adorably. “Here, I’ve got some take-out menus on my phone…” He stretched across her to open the drawer of the small table behind them, causing the blanket to slide off his body. Her eyes drank in the long lines of his strong back and his appealing derriere, and when he looked back, he shook his head playfully.

“Snow, cut it out,” he demanded, sliding his glasses back on. “We have to eat sometime.”

“How do you mean that, exactly?” She fluttered her eyelashes at him innocently and he burst into laughter, reaching for his phone.

“I mean, I’m ordering the food now, Caitlin. And I’ll keep you very entertained while we wait.”

“Oh, really?” She inquired archly, watching his finger flick capably across the online menu, hurriedly selecting a few of their favorite items. Harry tossed the phone on the table and hovered over her again, Caitlin’s fingers returning to grip and caress the tight, enticing muscles in his arms. 

“Really,” he promised, shaking his head in disbelief that they’d actually gotten over their mutual, emotional inhibitions. Caitlin thought he looked more truly happy than she’d ever seen him, and it warmed her heart until she felt ready to burst into tears. 

"Move in with me, Harry," Caitlin blurted out, surprising herself by giving bold voice to a wish she'd kept inside until now. It felt amazing, just _saying_ things. In fact, Caitlin thought she would probably keep it up. 

"Yeah," Harry answered without hesitation, "I'd love to, Cait." 

“I love _you_ ,” she repeated, “I’ll never let you doubt it again.”

“I love you back,” Harry answered, overwhelmed by joy. “Forever, Caitlin. Forever.”

**Author's Note:**

> I'm also working on a one-shot prequel to this fic that explains a bit more about how they got to this point in their relationship. That will be coming soon! :)


End file.
